


A flower cannot blossom without sunshine...

by heismysoulmate



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Flower Language, Fluff and Angst, I Tried, M/M, Merry Christmas, Secret Santa 2018, bokuto is dense, but there is a happy ending, knee injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-24 04:55:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17094308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heismysoulmate/pseuds/heismysoulmate
Summary: ...and man cannot live without love.





	A flower cannot blossom without sunshine...

**Author's Note:**

> here is my christmas present for luke (@gloomstars on twitter) for secret santa  
> i hope you'll like it  
> merry christmas! ♡
> 
> (you can find meaning of all flowers at the end)

“Another one?” Oikawa asked, amused, when Bokuto entered their flat with a bunch of flowers.

“Yes, they’re so pretty, aren’t they?” Bokuto beamed, putting them in the vase.

Oikawa took a closer look.  White Camellias, Mums and one single Gardenia . For Bokuto they were just flowers, but Tooru got a solid lesson about their language from Makki, who was a flower enthusiast, so the message behind them was clear for him. But he promised he won’t tell, so he just smiled at his friend.

“Yes, beautiful.”

“It’s so nice that Akaashi gives them to me. He knows I like pretty things. He really is the best friend. And our house looks really great when there are flowers, too.”

Tooru only nodded, but his heart squeezed in his chest.  _ If it only was the only reason why Akaashi was giving you those flowers, Bokuto. _

It made Oikawa think about flowers he was receiving. He remembered every flower Iwaizumi gave him after they got together.

Agrimony, Japonica, Heartsease, Phlox, he even got Calla Lily once. And then finally red Roses, white Carnation, Lavender and red Chrysantemus. All meaning love. Cause Iwaizumi really loved him.

But it was in the past.

Now he didn’t get any, and was only watching Bokuto bringing them home, unaware of feelings hiding behind their colorful petals and delicate stalks.

 

* * *

 

“Hey, Akaashi!” Bokuto was sitting by the table, coffee in one hand, while the other was waving wildly. 

Keiji approached him, hiding a smile beside his own cup.

“Good morning, Bokuto-san.”

Sometimes Akaashi was wondering how it happened that he started to have feelings for his friend. He knew him better than anyone. All his mood swings, how he was hyper almost all the time, his antics and silly jokes and how he couldn’t last without a daily amount of attention. But that meant he also knew how big his heart was, how he always had time for his friends when they needed him, how he had a good word for everyone around him, his bright smiles, and how, when really needed, he could be very still and quiet, watching butterflies with Akaashi. The same butterflies that were flying and dancing in his stomach every time that Bokuto was sitting really close, ignoring his personal space and making his whole body aching for a touch.

“Ready for another day?”

Keiji only nodded, and took a sip of his coffee.

“How was your week, Bokuto-san?”

Koutarou smiled and started talking animatedly about what he was doing lately, and Keiji was listening, sometimes nodding, or throwing some comment if needed. He liked to listen to Bokuto. He was loud and very expressive when he was saying his stories but it only made them more interesting.

“Oh, and Oikawa really liked the flowers I brought home last time. He said they fit really well.”

“He did?”

Oikawa knew. Akaashi was sure of it. He didn’t have to say anything. The looks he was throwing in his direction… He knew. But if he didn’t tell Bokuto by now, Keiji was sure he wasn’t going to. His secret was safe.

“Akaashi, look!” Warm hand stopped his train of thoughts. Bokuto was holding his hand, which was laying on the table, and showing him something outside the window. “It’s snowing.” 

Keiji tried to ignore what this little gesture was doing to him. He tried to stop the blush, and ignored the urge to intertwine their fingers. But still he wasn’t able to take his eyes off Bokuto. He was so beautiful. His shining eyes, spike hair, his always warm body, the way his lips expanded in a big smile… Akaashi loved it. He loved every part of him. Even if Bokuto didn’t love him back.

 

* * *

 

Oikawa was hobbling to the kitchen, when he heard his roommate arriving. He took a breath through clenched teeth, and put a fake smile on his lips.

“Hi.”

“Hey, Oikawa,” Bokuto’s tone was careful. “Um, where are your crouches?” He looked at his knee, but turned his gaze fast.

“Oh, they must be somewhere, I’m not sure,” Oikawa was faking his happy tone perfectly, but he wasn’t sure if he convinced Koutarou. “I just wanted a glass of water, I can walk a little without them. Oh, and what are these?” He asked pointing at flowers in Bokuto’s hand. Not so subtle change of subject.

“I asked Akaashi to do this for you. Cause it’s today, right? I thought maybe you would want to bring him something.”

At this Oikawa looked closer at exactly what flowers Bokuto was holding.  Pink Carnation, Furze, Forget me not, Harebell, Lemon Leaves, Marigold, Primrose, dark crimson Rose, Yew and Zinnia . His eyes filled with tears at the sight.

“They’re beautiful. Thank him from me.”

“Sure thing,” Bokuto smiled sadly at him. “Want me to go with you?”

“I’d rather go alone, Kou-chan.”

Bokuto only nodded and handed him flowers. He understood.

“When you come back we can watch something together, I’ll be waiting. Just… take your time.”

 

* * *

 

When Oikawa got to the destination he wasn’t faking a smile anymore.

“Hey, Iwa-chan,” he greeted a gravestone in front of him.

It was two years since Iwaizumi died.

Two fucking years since love of his life was lying cold in the ground, and Oikawa was left alone. Two years since Oikawa lost everything.

When Iwaizumi died his knee also gave up. Doctors were saying that it was due to the shock, and when he’ll get over his knee will be better too. But he never got over, and he wasn’t going to. Pain decreased but never disappeared. And he still wasn’t able to walk without help. His career was finished, but he didn’t really care. Without Hajime it all lost sense.

Tooru wasn’t dwelling on it. He knew how mad Iwa-chan would be if Oikawa just let it all go, wasting his life, just sitting there and doing nothing, too preoccupied with grief. He did it for almost two months after accident. Then some voice in his head, sounding surprisingly (or not) like his dead boyfriend, told him to get up and finally do something. And he did. But he still missed Hajime so much, and after all this time he was catching himself on thinking “I need to tell Iwa-chan about it” when something happened, and then realizing that there was no Iwa-chan to tell him anything.

 

* * *

 

When Oikawa came back home, eyes visibly red, and still shaking a little, Bokuto was sitting in the living room. He was really calm for him, patted Tooru on the shoulder, and then brought him water and painkillers.

“Wanna talk?” He asked after few more moments.

“Not really,” Oikawa whispered, wrapping himself in a blanket. “But I wouldn’t mind some company while watching a movie.”

Koutarou smiled brightly and without asking he started Tooru’s favorite movie.

Oikawa thought how lucky he was to have him here. After Hajime’s…. Mattsun and Makki were back in Miyagi, but he had Bokuto to keep his mind occupied when he needed it most, to make sure he was taking his medicine (which he refused to take in the beginning). Bokuto was a good friend and Oikawa really appreciated that. And he wanted to be a good friend, too. He wanted to help him. That’s why he asked.

“Kou-chan… You like Akaashi, right?”

“Sure, he's my best friend, you know that,” Bokuto answered, his eyes not leaving the screen.

“Yes but…” Oikawa stopped for a moment. He really shouldn't mess with their relationship. It wasn't his business, and they should work it out on their own. He promised himself he’s not gonna tell Bokuto about flowers for this reason. But he saw the face Koutarou was making every time when he was talking about Akaashi, how his eyes shone with completely new light. He just wanted to help him understand that, cause they were in this state for quite some time now, and it didn't look like something was about to change. “Don't you think he's pretty?”

Bokuto finally looked at him.

“Um… Maybe? I mean, he really cute sometimes. And his eyes are definitely pretty. And I like his smile…” Here it was. This little smile and dreamy eyes. 

“And you never thought about... I don’t know, dating him?”

Bokuto momentarily snapped out of his thoughts.

“What? No. That’s stupid. Why would you even ask that?” He was talking so fast that Oikawa had troubles understanding what exactly he was saying. “You’re… I’m not. Like, really Tooru, we were supposed to watch the movie.”

Oikawa rolled his eyes, but dropped the subject. If Koutarou didn't want to talk he couldn't make him.

 

* * *

 

When Akaashi saw Bokuto next time he was acting weird. He was always lively and moving a lot, but this time there was something nervous about it.

“Bokuto-san, are you okay?”

Keiji put a hand on his arm and Bokuto jumped. Usually he was first to make physical contact, but now he took a step away from Akaashi. He felt a pang in his heart at that, but kept his expression stoic. He was good at hiding his feelings.

“Yes, sure, why it wouldn’t?” Bokuto asked, a little too loud to be considered his normal voice.

“If you don’t want to talk about that it’s okay,” Akaashi said, hiding hands in his pockets.

Bokuto was fidgeting with his hands for a moment. Keiji thought that he’s not gonna say what’s on his mind, but then he spoke, not looking in his direction.

“You know, that Oikawa actually thought I like you? Like romantically? It’s so stupid. Where he got that idea? We are friends. And I like you, and we’re friends. Stupid Oikawa and his stupid ideas.”

_ Oh… _

“Yes,” Akaashi muttered, suddenly standing up. “I’ve just remembered that I have to do something. I have to go.”

And before Bokuto had a chance to say something, he was already going away, tears streaming down his face.

 

* * *

 

Oikawa was playing with yellow and orange petals of  Indian Cress from Bokuto’s new bouquet, which was standing on their kitchen island. So that was it. He wasn’t able to help them. He sighed heavily, when his friend dropped on the chair next to him.

“Okay, I may like him.”

Tooru looked at him confused, until he understood what, or rather who, Bokuto was referring to.

“Oh…,” he said, smug expression on his face. “You think?”

Maybe it wasn’t too late.

“I thought about it a lot lately… I’ve always had this strange feeling when he was touching me, and it never appeared with anybody else, but I never paid it any mind. I’m also really close with him, so I always thought it was natural for me to want to be with him all the time. And I keep thinking that... he really is pretty. And I don’t think I would mind if he kissed me,” at that Bokuto’s face turned red, and he looked down at his knees.

Oikawa frowned. This was good, but...

“Why are you talking to me about it? You should say it to him.”

Bokuto was always an open person when it was about feelings, so Tooru thought he wouldn’t have any problems confessing.

“I would, but I think he’s ignoring me since our last meeting. He sent me those flowers, but he’s not answering my messages, and I don’t know… It didn’t go great.”

Oikawa’s frown deepened.

“What happened?”

Koutarou told him how Akaashi left after their last meeting “and now I don’t know if it means he likes me back or not and…”

“Lord give me strength,” Oikawa sighed, looking up, as if he really was counting for some strength to fall from the ceiling. “C’mon, I need to show you something.”

 

* * *

 

That evening, after work, Akaashi was sitting on the couch with a tea in his hands, when he heard a door bell. No one was using it, everyone were knocking, so he went to open, curious.

There was no one outside. But something was lying on his doormat. A bunch of  Ambrosia .

**Author's Note:**

> Camellia (White) - You're adorable, Perfected loveliness  
> Mum - Hope  
> Gardenia - Purity, Sweet love, You're lovely  
> Agrimony - Thankfulness  
> Japonica - Loveliness  
> Heartsease - You occupy my thoughts  
> Phlox - Our souls are united  
> Calla Lily - Magnificent beauty  
> Rose (Red) - Love, I love you, Desire  
> Carnation (White) - Sweet, Lovely, Innocence, Pure love, Adoration  
> Lavender - Loyalty, Love, Devotion  
> Chrysantemus (Red) - I love you  
> Carnation (Pink) - I'll never forget you  
> Furze - Love for all occasions  
> Forget me not - True love, Faithfulness, Remembrance  
> Harebell - Humility, Grief  
> Lemon Leaves - Everlasting love  
> Marigold - Grief, Despair, Jealousy  
> Primrose - I can't live without you  
> Rose (Dark Crimson) - Mourning  
> Yew - Sorrow  
> Zinnia - Thoughts of an absent friend  
> Indian Cress - Resignation  
> Ambrosia - Your love is reciprocated


End file.
